2022年新高考全国I卷读后续写学生回忆版作文三篇（1）

　　阅读下面材料容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。

　　It was the day of the big cross-country run. Students from seven different primary schools in and around the small town were warming up and walking the route (路线) through thick evergreen forest.

　　I looked around and finally spotted David, who was standing by himself off to the side by a fence. He was small for ten years old. His usual big toothy smile was absent today. I walked over and asked him why he wasn't with the other children. He hesitated and then said he had decided not to run.

　　What was wrong? He had worked so hard for this event!

　　I quickly searched the crowd for the school's coach and asked him what had happened. "I was afraid that kids from other schools would laugh at him," he explained uncomfortably. "I gave him the choice to run or not, and let him decide."

　　I bit back my frustration (懊恼). I knew the coach meant well -- he thought he was doing the right thing. After making sure that David could run if he wanted, I turned to find him coming towards me, his small body rocking from side to side as he swung his feet forward.

　　David had a brain disease which prevented him from walking or running like other children, but at school his classmates thought of him as a regular kid. He always participated to the best of his ability in whatever they were doing. That was why none of the children thought it unusual that David had decided to join the cross-country team. It just took him longer -- that's all. David had not missed a single practice, and although he always finished his run long after the other children, he did always finish. As a special education teacher at the school, I was familiar with the challenges David faced and was proud of his strong determination.

日本据

　　注意：

　　1.续写词数应为150左右；

　　2.请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。

　　

　　下面的作文是今年高考结束后，由某市某重点中学三名重点班的考生回忆起来的“考场作文“。

　　读后续写1

　　We sat down next to each other, but David wouldn't look at me. He just ducked his head and stared at his own shoes. I asked him if he really decided not to run. He nodded, biting his lip. "Look,"I said calmly, "You never missed a single practice. You always finished every run. Do you want your efforts to end up in vain?" He hesitated a lot and murmured, "Other kids will laugh at me." l assured him that he would be the best runner on condition that he finished the run. Hearing my words, he finally made up his mind to run and I urged him to go to the starting line.

　　I watched as David moved up to the starting line with the other runners. He looked back at me and I cast him an encouraging smile. Then the race began. All the runners shot out like arrows. I cheered for him and headed towards the finishing line. As time wore on, other runners finished the run but I caught no sight of David. After what seemed like centuries, I finally saw he showed up with his forehead sweating heavily. I held my breath as his legs seemed to give out. Although David was the last to cross the finishing line, no one laughed at him. Thunderous applause erupted from the kids with everyone hailing David. His big toothy smile occurred again. It clicked that he hurdled his fear and fulfilled his potential, and the unremitting effort was worth it.

　　根据考生作文的内容和写作特点，笔者尝试利用思维导图的呈现方式厘清其写作思路和脉络，让读者快速了解续写的内容和构造。

　　

　　第一段展示学生和老师之间的谈心过程。经过老师一步步地劝说，学生从最初的不自信、不肯参加比赛，到最后被说服决定参赛。

　　描写学生的内心挣扎时，通过一系列的动作ducked, stared, bit, murmured，生动地展示了他的不自信、愧对老师和犹豫的心态。老师要说服这样一个学生也不容易，先问学生的决定，然后摆事实: You never missed ..., You always finished ..., you do not want your efforts to end up in vain，为了让他下决心，老师劝诱说只要跑完，他就是是个最好的跑者，他相信了。最后，老师要求学生前往起跑线。整段情节构思合乎情理，符合读者预期。

　　

　　第一段还有一个显著的写作特点值得关注：每一个环节双方动作有机地交织在一起，形成一一对应的态势，构建出一幅完整的师生谈心话轮图，这样的故事情节容易给改卷老师留下印象，改卷老师也能很快把分数送出去。

　　第二段考生提到David回头望了老师，老师回予笑容鼓励他，这个情节的设计表明考生对这位特殊学生的心理揣摩到位，对其个性把握准确。

　　关于对结局的设定，如果最后写David取得了前几名的话，肯定是不合理的，这会导致续写与原文的内容及思想的融合度不高。其实，原文的最后一段已经为续写第二段的走向奠定了基调。如：1）David had a brain disease ...; 2) It just took him longer ...; 3) he always finished his run long after the other children, he did always finish.

　　

　　考生还利用其他选手跑步之快来反衬David的特殊情况，此外，考生还通过描写老师没有看到David的身影来说明他跑得有多么的慢。考生对时间的描写有两处，一处是 As time wore on，另一处是After what seemed like centuries, 这都能显示David跑得实在太慢了。

　　这就是考生对情节设计的高明之处——当情况糟糕到无以复加的地步时，也就是出现转机的时候了——David只要跑完了全程就是好样的。

　　值得推荐的表达：

　　duck one's head 低下头；

　　bite one's lip 咬紧嘴唇；

　　cast sb an encouraing smile 朝某人微笑以示鼓励；

　　hurdle one's fear 跨越（克服）恐惧；

　　unremitting effort 不懈努力；

　　sweat heavily 流大汗；

　　as time wears / wore on 随着时间的流逝;

　　All the runners shot out like arrows 所有的选手都犹如离玄之箭；

　　Thunderous applause erupted from the kids with everyone hailing David 孩子们爆发出雷鸣般的掌声，大家都为大卫欢呼。.

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